***Take a peek into a scene where best friends, Ashley and Tinsley discuss the importance of hammers…(wink) đ
Enjoy!
Tinsley looked away. Hmm, she was definitely hiding something. Why was everyone trying to keep things from her?
âSince the friend you were on the phone with wasnât my sister, who was it?â
âNo one important.â
âOkay, who was it?â
âJust a friend, geez?â
âDoes this friend have a penis?â
âReally Ashley, why canât you just ask if my friend is a guy?â
âBecause not all guys have penises.â
âUh, yes they do. Youâre the sexpert, you should know that.â
âAnd as a sexpert I would like to let you know that not all guys have penises. Some guys have dicks.â
âAshley,â Tinsley shook her head. âI know Iâm going to regret asking you this but, whatâs the difference?â
âIâm glad you asked. Pass me my glass and Iâll tell you.â
Tinsley crawled back over to the nightstand. âI donât think I want to hear this.â She mumbled as she grabbed a glass and handed it to Ashley.
âThanks, okay, are you ready for a Sex Ed crash course?â
Tinsley lay back against a pillow. âWe should be writing articles, but I guess we can take a short break for you to explain this nonsense to me.â
âItâs not nonsense.â Ashley took a sip of her drink. âThis is the truth. I know the dictionary tells us that a dick is just the slang word for a penis. But once youâve experience a dick, you will never want to go back to a penis, I promise.â
âAshley, please quit saying the D word.â
âBut thatâs what itâs called.â
âI know but it sounds so gritty.â
âWhat would you rather I call it?â
âLetâs call it,â Tinsley thought for a second. âLetâs call it a hammer.â
âI LOVE IT. From now on that is what I am going to call it in my column. Yay, what would I do without you Tinsley?â
âProbably go crazy and succumb to your dark side.â
âYeah, I probably would. Anyway, once youâve had a hammer you will never return to a penis. Penises are okay, if youâre into making love and all that. But making love is for the birds.â
âI think making love is sweet.â Tinsley said.
âYeah when youâre married and have a house full of kids. Weâre young, we donât need penises, we need hammers. If he canât bang me out then we canât hang out.â
âMaybe we shouldnât use the word hammer. That puts painful images into my mind.â
âThereâs nothing wrong with a little bit of pain when youâre fucking.â
âAshley!â
âOkay, okay. I wonât say that word either. Listen, all men have penises. Theyâre born with them. But some men grow up and their penises grow also.â
âThatâs whatâs supposed to happen.â
âTrue, but some men grow more than others.â
Like the hair-sniffer guy. That dude was definitely packing. Damn it, why didnât she just touch it before she sprayed him? Focus Ashley.
âAnyway, some menâs penises grow into hammers. Those are the kind of men we want in our lives. We want the hammers.â
âAnd what makes a hammer so special?â
âBecause itâs a hammer, thatâs why. Duh. Hammers go deep and touch all of those hard to reach places.â
Tinsley burst out laughing.
âItâs not funny. Iâm serious.â
Want to read more? Check out Dark Fantasies, available now!
~Dark Fantasies: Book 2 of the Fantasy Diary Series.~
One kiss was all it took.
Between work, family and her ex-boyfriend, Ashley Blakely is completely stressed out. She doesnât have time to write in her fantasy diary or compete in the annual âfantasy wishâ competition her and her sisters have going. The only thing she wants for Christmas is normalcy.
All hope of a normal Christmas⊠or life⊠fly out the window the moment sheâs kissed by Kelan Grant. Now sheâs swept up in a whirlwind of romance, seduction and danger. She wants no part of this new life. Yet once she finds out that her sisters and her best friend are in jeopardy, she will do whatever it takes to keep them safe. Even allow herself to be kidnapped and handcuffed by a devil in disguise.
Dr. Kelan Grant always keeps his word. The moment he lays eyes on Ashley, he vows she will be his for eternity. He doesnât care that his brother is mated to her sister and wants to keep their real heritage a secret from the Blakely family. Kelan will do whatever it takes to claim his bride.
Kidnapping her is the easy part. Winning her heart is going to take some strategic planning. But between the dark angels stalking him and Ashleyâs constant need to break every item in his home, Kelan is having a hard time romancing the woman who he feels already belongs to him.
Will he get the eternity with Ashley heâs envisioned? Or will his enemies snatch her from his grasp and awaken the monster he tries to hide?
***A look into book two â Dark Fantasies: Ashley and Kelanâs story.***
Dear Diary,
I havenât written to you in a long while. Iâve been so busy with, well, life. But now I have something juicy to share and Iâm not allowed to tell anyone else. Of course Alyssa knows, but sheâs going through a few changes right now so my new protector wonât let me see her. My protector is who Iâm writing to you about today.
You see, Iâve been kidnapped. No, donât panic, itâs not anything to get upset about. At first I thought it was. When he first took me I was pissed. But Iâm slowly learning that this beast who calls himself my mate is simply a big softy, who wouldnât harm me no matter how many times I tell him to f**k off, and I do tell him that a lot.
Anyway, weâre kind of hiding from these angel assassins right now so I figure, why not take advantage of this situation and use it to do some research for my erotic romance column. I already have the title for the column picked out: âHow To Seduce A Vampire.â My readers are going to love it.
Of course, my protector isnât talking to me right now, the big baby is mad at me for breaking his brand new television. In my defense, I did tell him I was going to tear sh*t up if he didnât release me. He actually tied me up, can you believe that?
Oh, well, I guess in order to get what I want Iâll just have to walk around the house naked.
Iâm sure heâll pounce. Heâs a predator and Iâm going to pretend to be the prey. Once we get rid of all these pesky assassins, I am going back to my regular life. Mr. Big Bad Vampicus â thatâs what I call a mix between a vampire and an incubus by the way. Anyway, Mr. Big Bad Vampicus is just going to have to find himself another mate. An independent girl like me and a domineering beast like him would never work out.
Xoxo Ashley
Book order:
Bk 1: Christmas Fantasy – http://www.amazon.com/Christmas-Fantasy-Diary-Book-ebook/dp/B00KXE6SF4/
Bk 2: Dark Fantasies – http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00OGPJ2KO
Tinsley’s story is coming soon: Wicked Fantasies – BK 3 in the Fantasy Diary Series